Sexy? Been There, Done That?

Mini Skirt? 4-inch heels? For what???

Girl is out with friends. Boy sees girl in a sexy dress. They exchange numbers. They date and (in a perfect world) fall in love. Girl stops wearing sexy dresses. Sound familiar?

The is the classic case of the old ‘Bait and Switch’ or as my good friend Jeff calls it, a swindle. I’ve known girls who meet a guy and had him feeling like the luckiest man in the room. His boys said he couldn’t do it but, he did! And for the first few dates, she was doing the MOST when it comes to getting ready. Nail done, hair done, everything BIG! Ladies, you know how it goes. You are the baddest chick and you revel in the glory of seeing his jaw fall on the floor when he comes to pick you up from your apartment. You’re thinking, “Yeah, I got this!”. And for the most part, you do! Get ’em girl!! The poor man doesn’t stand a chance against those curves in your Top Shop dress and 4-inch Chrissy Loubs!

When we are single, sexy and free, we are experts in what to wear and do to get a guy. When we finally DO get one, we act like we forgot how to even spell SENSUAL. All of a sudden, our hair is in a ponytail all the time and the tight dresses are pushed all the way to the back of the closet. Hell! We don’t even wear lip gloss anymore! And you’re sitting here saying to yourself , ‘For what?! He’s my man. I did what I needed to do to get him and he loves me for me now. I don’t need to impress him anymore’.

I’m here to tell you, you are dead wrong! I’m not saying that you should be a Barbie doll for your Sig’s sole enjoyment. But you SHOULD continue to be the sexy, confident, fly girl he took home that night met! This right here reminds me of Kelly Rowland’s verse in ‘Cater to You’ where she sings: “I’ll keep it tight/keep my figure right/I’ll keep my hair fixed/Keep rockin’ the hottest outfits”. Hello! This is the blueprint right here. Here are my reasons for keeping it sexy after getting the title.

  1. Imagine if he did that mess to you! He wouldn’t live a day in his life with hearing about how he has a little tummy now and why does he have to wear a wife beater EVERYWHERE? I’m not going to lie. If my man’s daily uniform all of a sudden became his favorite basketball shorts, I’d probably shred them in his sleep. Not really. But you get the idea.
  2. If not for you, at least do it for yourself. Nothing makes me feel more confident than when my hair is done and I look good…for ME! I feel unstoppable and I know you do too.
  3. The competition is none. We all know guys look at other women when we’re not looking. But why give them a real reason? You need to have Gabrielle Union walk into the room and ask YOU where you got your shoes! Your man should be thinking “Gabby’s alright but, she ain’t effin’ with my baby.”

Ladies, am I right or wrong? Do you think staying sexy is important to the overall health of a relationship or do you feel that your man should take you as you are, flaws and all?

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3 Responses to Sexy? Been There, Done That?

  1. PREACH!

    Someone needs to tattoo this on me memento style.

    Ive went from hottest chic in the club to answering the door with rollers in, and i know im not the only one.

    My whole motivation used to be – use my expensive makeup so it can get smeared off? WHY?

    But now i understand -though you’re with the man, you have to keep the mystique and intrigue alive.
    Great post!
    Nice legs too! lol


  2. Neisha says:

    We as women all fall victim to this… Its called comfort!

    Once we’ve dated someone for a certain peroid of time, little things like putting on lip gloss or even big things like waxing that bikini bush gets put on the back burner. Look at Khloe Kardashian in that episode of her reality show, she forgot to wax for her husband an NBA Star and Athlete!!!!

    I get it! Beauty is pain! And It can expensive! Sometimes hrs in the hair salon is just not the move! Me and my girls pick a day and go together. Make an event out of it. Lunch in between pedi’s and waxing.

    But no matter how many children we pop out, how many years we’ve been married, or together… Lets not let him know we’re that comfortable EVER! Stayin on top of your game not only is a confident booster but it will also keep him on his toes!

  3. J.Meyer says:

    Dope! Also I can relate from the shorts getting cut up but make sure you buy another pair.. Staying in love is a two way street and appearance is a big part. It’s like this If no one wants you why should your man and vice versa. So stay on point cause if your not someone else will….


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