Ask A Real Dude: Good Guy Gone Bad

ALL GUYS ARE GOOD. Yeah, I said it. There are just things, or rather a series of events that cause him to turn in to an a$$h•le. No, I’m not just copping a plea here. There is a quote that describes what I’m saying in a nutshell: ” Your heart can sometimes be your weakness, but your experiences have to be your strength”. Experience is what turns a boy into a man.

Men are a made up of a bunch of events which gives us the strength or a sense of  insecurities that we tend display on a daily basis. So, if your man doesn’t open up to you, don’t blame yourself. It’s not you, it’s his past and no matter what you say he won’t let you in fully until he can fully trust you. But, beware of the actors who play that roll just to suck you in and make you rack your brain on ways to make them happy. These are called Users. Believe me I know, I used to be one. First, they watch and learn you, then lay it on thick, and when they have you, they pull away slowly then give big. Sad but true. That’s why most females stay in broken relationships. Its like a brain-washing of the spirit and it works! You may ask, why or how do I spot a User? My answer: there’s no sure fire way to spot one. But, what you can do is let your man talk and just listen. Don’t just hear his voice listen to his words. Eventually, he will say (and show) what kind of guy he is.

Another way to spot a jerk is if he makes it seem like all his relationships were perfect. Hmmmm… Yeah right. Ladies, just ponder to yourself and ask how come Mr. Perfect is not married yet if he’s such a catch. Nobody is perfect! Remember that. Not even you. Your mate may come close in your head but unless he is GOD there are flaws. You may not be able to see them, but ask your friends and they will tell you. At least a real friend. Guys that have been hurt tend to build walls. Remember guys are primitive and in turn very protective to things that they care for, no matter the person. That alone turns a good guy bad. Especially when you let someone in and they destroy your spirit. It happens to everyone, I know. But remember, guys handle pain differently. So the next time your man is acting like as a$h•le just remember that it’s coming from a place that you haven’t tapped into yet. So take a breath, be the thinker that you are, and figure him out ’cause when you do, it’s smooth sailing from then on.  Until a man finds himself, it’s impossible to lose him, because you never had him…even though he would be glad to.

– J. Meyer

Follow J on twitter @JMeyer718

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About The Girls

sweatpants, hair tied, chillin' with no makeup on. and taking over the world.
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