Resolutions: They Arent Just For New Years.

F or honesty’s sake, I’m willing to admit it:  I’ve truly been in a daze recently. What was clear has become unclear, the constant has become very inconsistent. Why? Several people involved my life (People that have been a part of it for years now) have fallen short of my expectations and it forced me to look at them in a new light.
Now this ain’t my first rodeo, so I’ve come to understand my reactions and why they occur. I’ve become very acquainted with the emotional routine of it all. My first reaction to someone falling short has always been to

A.) Distance myself from the offending party aka the cut-off
B.) Question my people skills and intuition for not seeing it coming and C.)The third and final step was to throw another barrier up as a form of self-protection or self-preservation (depending on how close I was with the offending party) and hold onto that grudge with a kung-fu grip!

With every passing birthday I seem to get more set in my ways– taking this from a practice to a full-blown recuperation plan.
Shutting people out and holding grudges has to be the most basic form of coping, but it’s what I know how to do. After some deep conversations with the bestie and a couple of home cooked meals with the girls this past weekend… I’m realizing that maybe this plan needs serious revising. One question that particularly hit me:

“Who’s Perfect?”

The look on my face hasn’t been blanker since Advanced Calculus I’m sure, but I definitely knew the answer. She said it before I could muster anything:
“No One. “

“Absolutely no one on this earth is perfect. People are going to fall short everyone you know will at some point. You shouldn’t pin too much on people because at the end of the day- they’re just human. Holding on to the actions of another person will get you nowhere. You have no choice but to let the past go – it’s the past. Learn the lesson, heal yourself and move on.
The trick is getting to know yourself, getting to know what you want out of people. Only then can a person really give you what you want and live up to your expectations.”

These words had the sharp intensity of an ice pick and have been slowly throbbing in my brain ever since.

I’ve made a resolution to try my best to reverse this learned practice (As seen in exhibits A-C) and to really embrace the people I surround myself with-both the pick-me-ups and the let downs are a part of life I have to learn to deal with. Living this will be a hard process for me, as most anything worth attaining is. But I’m confident that it will be for the best.
In moments like this I realize that becoming a well-adjusted adult is a process of realization and emotional growth. I used to think that the beautiful person would only come after the metamorphosis, when in reality it’s the process, the moments of clarity and growing through where true beauty is revealed.

Being a work in progress is not as bad as it sounds.
Understanding our emotional shortcomings and resolving to do and be better is done through reflection so every morning when you take a glimpse of that girl in the mirror, make sure to really take a LOOK in the MIRROR.
Stay truly beautiful.

-Jo

Advertisements
This entry was posted in girls night in, Life Lessons, random. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Resolutions: They Arent Just For New Years.

  1. beedee says:

    Aww josey! I here ya…people letdowns are the worst to cope with, and for me it was b/c I felt that I should receive the same satisfaction and “whatever it takes” attitude that I give out, in return. Finding out that, regardless of how you treat people or expect them to react and respond in your friendship/relationship, people WILST let you down. Just the nature of human nature (for some) I suppose. But as you said, knowing this and accepting this helps in the process of becoming a well-adjusted grown-up 🙂 so cheers to that!

  2. kmackbrand says:

    I feel like you were in my thoughts and decided to just type everything you heard/saw.
    I am the same exact way. When ppl disappoint me, I’m just like…you know what? I’m good and that’s it. I have nothing further to say – hence…the cut off. I will admit that I am seemingly stuck in my ways and see that the way I think it not the way the masses think which ultimately leads to ppl calling me “strange” or “crazy”. I’m ok with that bc most great artists are called the same.

    But I digress…the good thing is that I know myself better than ever and try to figure out what it is that I want from people. I tend to see things in black and white which people translate into always seeing things one-sided to which I could only disagree.

    Nevertheless…you aren’t the only one and it IS in fact a process.

    • joannagenius says:

      K,

      I realized i was strange in the 5th grade. Life has since been easier for me lol.

      The cutoff is the easiest road to take, but not necessarily the best one.

  3. Cutting people off isn’t always bad. You don’t want to do it for every infraction, but some people NEED cutting off. Kudos to you for looking inward as well.

    Janna

    • joannagenius says:

      thank you so much ❤

      I am the cutoff QUEEEN…
      But when the tactic becomes a cycle that we might look to solve the problem another way…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s